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Mental health problems are a part of me, but they don't define who I am...
June 2013
- New job
This time last year (2012) I was attending Tools for Living course with SAMH - Going Forth. Tools for living, as the name suggests gave me the tools to live a normal live. Like physical illnesses no one can wave a magic wand and make the hurt go away. Through their brilliant support Iv learnt to manage my anxiety and return to paid work.
It's a group therapy course, which was scary at first but in the end helped me alot. Being around people, that also have mental health problems made me feel less isolated and alone. If I told them I had a bad day there was no need to say any more, they understood.
Go back another year to June 2011- I still found it difficult to be in busy places or on public transport. I would take convoluted journeys to get to my destination, just to avoid the busy high street. My Insomnia was pretty bad, a mix of my IBS and anxiety both contributed to this.
Despite all that it was also the same year I started volunteering in my local community. Express Group being one of those organisations. Volunteering gave me a reason to leave the house, gave me back a sense of purpose and helped build my confidence.
Volunteering also gave me something to add to my CV so I didn't have a gap. Which really helped when I started applying for jobs.
Once the tools for living course was complete It gave me the confidence to ask to be referred to SAMH - Pantry. A Supported back to work training program, that gave me hands on experience working in a busy kitchen.
It's been a long tough journey, taking 3 steps forward and 2 steps back every so often. However I have returned to work, I am now doing a 20 hour a week part time job in a busy cafe.
Where all individuals what worked for me might not work for you, but these are the 3 top things that kept me going.
1. Keep a good sense of humour.
Anxiety and depression are not logical, sometimes it's good to laugh at yourself. On one of my bad days I tried to tidy my clothes iron away into my Fridge. Well it's one way of cooling it down, though I don't really recommend trying it.
2. Positive reinforcement
It's easy to get so focused on the bad things that happen, that we forget the good. It's a cognitive behaviour technique. A fancy way of saying changing bad habits. Before I went to bed at night I made myself list all the good things that happened that day, along with the bad.
I also had a list stuck on my fridge of the things Iv achieved in life, that way I would always see it. It did confuse my younger brother though, my mum had to explain to him what it was. Looking back now I still laugh when I remember the confused look on his face!!!
3. Turn a negative into a positive
My main way of doing that is through this blog. The main focus of the blog Food intolerances and coping with them on a limited budget. Living with IBS can be challenging, especially due to the lack of information. People are scared to talk about digestive problems.
Also I don't hide the fact I have mental health problems. If I made one other person feel less isolated then it's worthwhile.
My IBS and mental health problems are not going to go away, Iv just learnt to manage both of them a lot better. As long I avoid foods that make me ill and cook everything from scratch, my IBS pain and discomfort is bearable. As long as I continue to use my anxiety management techniques I can continue to enjoy everyday life, instead of being afraid of it xxxx
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